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Complete Story Synopsis
We begin in a Tyrolean wonderland. Young Heike dances before the Alps, singing joyfully to her baby son Greg, “My boy, the future belongs to you and me.” The idyllic past is fleeting though, twenty-five years later Heike’s lederhosen have grown crusty. She stumbles about her kitchen, hung-over, wondering why the family is out of cornflakes. But the family lacks more than cornflakes. Heike’s husband Schatzi doesn’t work, so Greg, now a young man, works himself ragged supporting his mother, his sister, Greta, and his stepfather. This particular morning, Greg consoles his mother. She was woken by Greta’s shrill violin. Greta may study at the music conservatory, but to Heike ears it’s Eine Kleine Shit Music. Heike is at odds with the somewhat tarty Greta. She also laments that Greta didn’t inherit her ability on the alpenhorn. Heike claims her lungs were the toast of Interlaken; she blew harder than any girl in the valley. Greta fires back, “All that blowing and you still ended up with that lazy sot Schatzi. They almost come to blows. Greg pulls them apart.
Greg leaves his dysfunctional home to hawk his wares in the dystopian cityscape. Surveillance cameras follow his every move. He works as a salesman for the megalithic Super Tube Vacuum Company. When Super Tube boss, Mr. Schlongen, tells Greg he needs to improve his sales, Greg wavers. His route – comprised of cathedrals, rectories and nunneries – is far from fertile territory. Greg doesn’t even mention that he has disturbing memories of Catholic school. Traumatic recollections of when nuns carried scissors and young boys feared their wrath. Mr. Schlongen demands that Greg work harder. He suggests Greg stay over a few days in the city. Greg agrees, as long as he can be back in a couple days to attend a concert with Greta.
After his pep talk, Greg suffers another unsuccessful day of peddling vacuums - calling on lecherous priests and daft hunchbacks. He finishes the day at the Hard Luck Lounge, drinking his meager wages and discussing his woes with three other Super Tube Salesmen. They are unsympathetic. The Salesmen snicker when Greg engages with Flint, a seedy character who really needs a vacuum. Flint writes his address on an envelope for Greg and places a special gift inside.
Greg opens the envelope in his dank motel room. Flint has given him a tawdry pin up photo. Possessing smut is not acceptable, but Greg erroneously believes the room’s disheveled surveillance camera isn’t working. The camera later records him in bed, uploading the photo to a portable device – his Super Tube Electronic Imager - and then doctoring the photo to remove the sexy woman’s face.
The following day Greg ventures off his route to see Flint. The man’s carpets are truly dirty. Unfortunately Flint won’t buy a vacuum; he merely wants to borrow one. Greg won’t stand for this break in protocol, so Flint tries to entice him with some nun smut. This has the opposite effect on Greg (dominatrix nuns with scissors are nothing to clap about) and he runs screaming out of Flint’s apartment. This, serendipitously, gives Flint the opportunity to lock Greg outside and steal his vacuum.
Distraught over his lost vacuum, Greg returns to the Hard Luck Lounge and drinks till he drops. His snooze lapses when the three Salesman brawl with a scruffy Old Marxist. Greg runs outside to escape the fight. Within moments, Flint charges by. Greg runs after Flint, screaming for his vacuum. Unexpectedly, and how could it not be, Flint spontaneously combusts. By the time Greg reaches the scene, Flint is merely a pile of ash – his flames extinguished by Super Tube water cannons.
Greg returns home to his drunken mother and lazy stepfather, Schatzi. He’s forced to give more money to Schatzi. Heike spent her entire allowance on cornflakes. Greg then heads into the bathroom and unexpectedly encounters his sister – naked in the shower. He nervously retreats but drops his glasses. Greta returns the glasses to Greg in his room. She’s coquettish. Greg is awkward and apologetic, but still wants to go to the concert. Greta explains that she also asked Wolfgang. Greg doesn’t want to be the third wheel. He excuses himself as too tired.
That night Greg awakes in a sweat after a disturbing dream about self-immolation. His Electronic Imager glows from his nightstand. His sister’s face is now pasted on the photo of the sexy woman – seamlessly retouched. Feeling guilty, and a bit distraught his dream, he hides the imager in his armoire. He locks his bedroom door when he hears Schatzi singing drunk in the living room.
Greg awakes the next morning as a giant bug. His alarm sounds incessantly – beep, beep, beep – but he can’t reach it. He’s stuck on his back, unable to right his exoskeleton. No one else can see him. Schatzi, hung-over and agitated, barks through the bolted door. Heike arrives and tries to convince Greg to get up and go to work. Schatzi suggests Greg is playing "twiggly wiggly." He blames his wife for coddling the boy and turning him into a pervert. Greta arrives to find the couple arguing over Greg’s unsociable behavior. Greta wants no part of the discussion but is forced to stay when Super Tube’s Mr. Schlongen comes calling. Greg has violated company protocol; his show vacuum is missing. At the front door, Schatzi tries to sweet talk Schlongen. “Greg is the third generation of Samsas to work at Super Tube.” Meanwhile, Greta tries to coax Greg out of his room. Greg responds to Greta’s cooing with a shrill-like bug ululation. Greta’s unnerving scream brings Schlongen into the living room. The alarm still beeps. He demands answers, to see Greg. Schatzi shoos Greta from the room and tries for damage control. He succeeds through sheer annoyance. Mr. Schlongen will let Greg come to him. Schatzi escorts Schlongen to the front door. Meanwhile, Greg finally manages to get out of bed and unlatch his bedroom door. He charges after his boss and his step-dad, calling their attention with another shrieking ululation. "Ek ekekekekek." Both men are startled, but Schlongen is able to piece together the puzzle – the bug is Greg, his transformation a consequence of some unmentionable perversion. Schatzi is dumbfounded. Schlongen leaves Schatzi with more bad news: The family owes for Greg’s missing vacuum.
Schatzi can’t protect Heike from seeing Greg. She faints with fear. Greta is frightened but not hysterical. She tends to her mother as Schatzi forces Greg back in his room.
Later, Heike refuses to believe the bug is Greg. She doesn’t trust Mr. Schlongen or Schatzi. Greta, egged on by Schatzi, eventually admits that she sensed the bug was Greg. She cites other examples of these transformations. Heike initially scoffs at the examples, they happened to perverts - “boys who licked the sister’s strudels.” Then she and Schatzi have an aha moment. Greta is to blame. She let him. Greta argues her innocence. Greg scrambles back into the room, exhorting his shrill ululation, seemingly in support of Greta. Chaos ensues. Heike is frightened. Schatzi prods Greg back into his room.
The next morning, the house is quiet as Greg crawls into the bathroom. Greta surprises him as he tries to drink from the toilet. He falls off the bowl and gets wedged between the toilet and wall. Greta has no other choice but to pull him free– “a girl needs to pee.” Later that day she confronts her fears again and brings Greg water. He drinks it. She tries bringing him food - Jell-O is too slippery and he doesn’t like milk, lettuce or Kielbasa.
Schatzi likes Kielbasa. He’s unhappy that Greta left his sausage for the vermin. Now all they have to eat is cornflakes, lots of them, but no milk. Schatzi tries to eat the cornflakes with water. He spits them out, exclaiming, “Nobody likes soggy cornflakes.”
Greg loves soggy cornflakes. He rolls them up in a tight ball – like a dung beetle might – and eventually eats them. Greta brings him fresh batches and the unlikely siblings bond again. She never calls him by name, but she talks to him (he responds with a shrill “ekekekekek.”). One day, Greg tries to impress her by climbing up the wall and ceiling. Greg was acceptable on the ground, but Greta freaks out when he hangs above her. Then she really freaks out when Greg accidentally drops a load of brown bug goo on her head. She showers and showers to get the stuff off.
After the goo incident, Greta avoids Greg’s room. She just shoves his food through the door. Hoping to make amends, Greg uses the cornflakes to write messages on the floor. His messages go unseen.
The Samsas lack for money. They’ve already given blood and sold much of their furniture. When a Salesman from Super Tube (seen earlier at the Hard Luck Lounge) comes to collect for Greg’s missing vacuum, Schatzi has little to offer. The Salesman asks for Schatzi’s prized beer stein collection. Schatzi balks – not his precious vessels. He suggests the Salesman take Greta’s violin as compensation. Greta throws a shitfit. The Salesman, who is obviously attracted to Greta, offers to make a far different deal. Schatzi encourages him, “she’s feisty, but she’s easy.”
Greta gets a spot on a TV game show, The Mating Game. The male contestants are the enthusiastic Salesman, the acerbic Old Marxist and the disaffected Wolfgang. Super Tube sponsors the show. All Greta has to do is choose the Salesman and then the Samsas woes are over. Unfortunately Greta goes for Wolfgang and his Eurotrash charm. Wolfgang rejects her offer. He’s tempted by the three-month supply of free pretzels, but he just can’t commit to Greta. Schatzi chucks his precious beer stein into the TV screen.
Greg eventually coaxes Greta back into his room. He’s written a new cornflake message for her, “Sell My Stuff.” Greg doesn’t need furniture and the family needs money. So Greta brings Heike into Greg’s to inspect his furniture. Greg stays out of sight, obscured by a bed sheet. As they look through his things, Greta finds the Electronic Imager. She starts it up against her mother’s objection. Greta is sure the imager contains information about Greg’s lost vacuum. She’s wrong. As the screen boots up, Greg bolts out of his hiding place and knocks the imager out of Greta’s hands. Heike becomes hysterical; her fragile mental state has been rocked again. She bolts out of the room. Greta stays long enough to see what Greg had to hide - her racy image on the screen. She’s disgusted.
As Greg shoves the imager into a heating duct, he hears his sister’s voice from afar. “Mom. Stop!” Greg races into his mother’s room. Heike is at wit’s end. She douses her clothes and some bedding with kerosene. Greta grabs the kerosene away, but Heike is able to light a match. Immediately the bedding catches fire. Greta pulls her mother to safety as the bedding continues to burn. Greg is left to save the day. He attacks the burning mass like a big pile of cornflakes. He rolls and rolls the bedding and eventually smothers the flames. The moment of relief ends when Schatzi arrives home. This is the last straw. He decides Greg has to go. Schatzi takes an andiron and charges toward Greg. Greta tries to stop Schatzi. Schatzi knocks her back, but Greg is able to escape to the living room. Schatzi chases Greg and eventually corners him. He pulls the andiron back. Ready to skewer. This time, Heike stops him, dramatically positioning herself between Schatzi and Greg’s prone exoskeleton. Traumatic memories come back to her. She remembers the day she had to give Young Greg over to the nuns. Heike’s not going to lose her son again.
Greg lives, but remains isolated in his room. Schatzi cuts a hole in the base of his door to push food through. No more going inside. Depressed, Greg stops eating. He spends his days merely listening to his family’s conversations. After her suicide attempt, Heike pops pills and spends her days in a state of delirium. Schatzi coaxes Greta into getting a night job. Greg fantasizes that his sister will be a violinist. She actually gets a job as a go-go dancer, working for Mr. Schmerl at the outré Unterclub. Greta likes the job. She arrives home after her first night and exclaims that she is a performer. “You should of seen me…People were cheering.” Greg hears the news and excitedly climbs the wall. A brown stain of bug goo oozes in his wake.
Greg becomes re-energized, climbing the walls and pushing cornflakes. He writes his largest cornflake message to date. “I’m Sorry.” Weeks later the message is still there. Unseen. Greg’s walls are also covered in brown muck, causing a horrible stench. Greta and Schatzi both refuse to clean the muck and the family can’t afford to hire someone.
Greta’s dancing income won’t support the family. They need to take on borders. Schatzi offers Greta’s room to Wolfgang. Greta objects, but realizes no one will move in with the stench. Schatzi has a solution for that as well.
Greta performs a private dance for the Old Marxist – titillation and anti-capitalism. When she strips down to a hammer and sickle bikini, he exhorts, “the revolution is coming soon.” In turn The Old Marxist cleans Greg’s room. He scrubs the brown muck and sweeps away “I’m Sorry” message. He also discovers Greg’s hidden Electronic Imager. He steals it away. This will eventually lead to Greg’s demise.
Wolfgang and his Eurotrash friend, Peter, move into the Samsa house. They do little beside play loud, annoying music through a series of odd, electronic contraptions. When Greta tries to practice her violin in the living room, Wolfgang hooks her up to his Electro-Metamorphasizer. Greta, at first, rebels, but he convinces her to keep playing. The results are magical. The device translates Greta’s notes into a lilting voice. Greg hears the voice and it compels him to escape his room. Chaos ensues. Greta walks out – she won’t play for him - leaving Wolfgang and Peter terrified. Schatzi comes home and finds the two bandmates stranded on the couch. “Our contract says nothing about giant vermin.” They’re moving out and Schatzi’s irked. He charges Greg in a fit of rage. Schatzi never reaches Greg though. He trips on a cord and smashes Greta’s prized violin. Greg responds with a deafening ululation. Then something magical happens... Greg’s voice comes through the Electro-Metamorphasizer. He can communicate. Peter and Wolfgang realize they’ve found their vocalist. They will keep letting the room. Electronic Dung is born.
It is a win-win situation for everyone except Greta. That night she sleeps with her broken violin. Greg wants to console her through the machine, but he can’t turn it on.
Greg arrives at the Unterclub in a wooden crate and Electronic Dung plays their first gig. They open for the Old Marxist. Greta dances. Her sexy Carmen Miranda outfit inspires Greg to improvise a calypso jig – Jugo de Piña. The crowd loves it. The band becomes a cult sensation. They open more gigs for the Old Marxist, but everyone come to see Electronic Dung.
Greta becomes smitten with Wolfgang. She’s not happy though with the way he treats her brother. When out of his room, Greg is kept in the crate. Wolfgang says it is for safety. Wolfgang also won’t let speak to Greta the Electro-Metamorphasizer. If he could speak, Greg might tell Greta that Wolfgang is cheating on her, running around the other go-go dancer.
Schatzi eventually gets the band a show at the Super Tube arena. It’s a big break, but not everyone is happy. Wolfgang rejects the mainstream venue, but is forced to go along. The Old Marxist is left off the bill and feels slighted. He vows revenge.
On the big night everyone comes to see Greg. It’s a grand event. The Super Tube Salesman hock caramel apples and give away vacuum coupons. The band doesn’t disappoint. As Greta dances in a go-go cage, Greg works the crowd. He sings with conviction and style about his odd fate and his errant ways. The crowd dances in the aisles. Everything is great, and then the power goes out. The room goes dark.
The Old Marxist has orchestrated a scheme for revenge. First he beams a spotlight on Greta. She’s all that is visible on the stage. Then the Old Marxist projects a lurid – albeit doctored – photo of Greg and Greta. The crowd doesn’t like it. The Old Marxist yells, “It’s his sister. It’s his sister.” The crowd becomes angry.
Greta remains stuck in her cage. She doesn’t have her key. She yells to Wolfgang for help. But Wolfgang is lured away by the other go-go dancer. The Old Marxist bribed her to lock Greta in her cage and keep the key.
Greg tries to help Greta out of her cage. Caramel apples fly in from the crowd. Greg climbs up on the cage. For the first time he sees the Old Marxist’s lurid photo projection. He can’t help but unleash a load of brown bug goo. Greta takes the brunt of the slime. Grossed out, she flails her arms and flings the goo. The crowd reacts with more artillery. One caramel apple hits Greg directly. He falls backward onto the stage, unable to right himself. Angry men from the crowd charge the stage. Greg fears the worst, until Greta reaches through her cage bars and helps Greg to his feet. He scurries away, avoiding the men and hides in a dumpster.
Greg spends a wet night in the dumpster as Greta, Schatzi and Heike go back to their house defeated and dejected. The future is bleak.
The next day Mr. Schmerl arrives at the Samsa house. There is good news, Greta is a media darling, a poor victim of a lecherous vermin. She’s going to be a star. Heike and Schatzi can’t believe the news. The want to tell with Greta, but she’s not there.
Greta sits beside Greg in the dumpster. He’s in bad shape, almost gone. She consoles him. When he looks to her, he imagines his mother. In a moment he is back in the Tyrolean paradise of his youth, singing an ode to his mother.
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